I never met Charlotte Dawson. I watched her from afar. I followed her on Twitter and other than being an unashamed Australia’s Next Top Model fan, and a viewer of the morning shows she frequented, I really had nothing more to do with her.
And yet, when I read of her passing my heart sank. I may never have met Dawson but I have met so many like her. So many close to me who are battling the same demons she was.
To me Charlotte Dawson was a glamourous socialite. A sophisticated celebrity trying to use her voice for good instead of bad. She was looking for someone to listen.
But me – who am I? For so long I have felt I am nobody. I’m a writer who occasionally gets stuff published here and there but in the grand scheme of everything I thought I was a nobody. I have an ego like everyone else, of course, but really I have thought for so long that I was nothing, no one. I’m not a celebrity or a sports person or anyone remotely famous. I had accepted that and was content with that.
That was until recently. In the past months, even years, and right up until last weekend when I read Charlotte Dawson’s story. In all of this time I had failed to see that I WAS somebody. I was somebody that could help. I was – actually I am — somebody. I am somebody to those who I love, to those who love me. And to so many in my life who are battling mental illness in all of its horrible and heartbreaking forms.
I am somebody that can be there to listen. Somebody who can offer a shoulder to cry on. A smile to make you laugh or simply someone who can offer a hug when words just aren’t enough. So many of us find ourselves fighting to be the best, to become someone, and yet we never stop to take the time to really look around; we fail to see we are somebody already.
We are somebody to someone in our lives. We are that support, that smile, that friend. Throughout my whole life I’ve seen mental illness. It has been close to me and it’s incredibly painful. Watching the ones you love crumble as a dark hole embeds them is something no one wants to see. It’s not easy, it’s hard, it hurts and often it feels like there is nothing you can do.
Sometimes you won’t know what to say or how to act. Sometimes you will feel like your loved ones have disappeared, they won’t be themselves. They are there in person but in spirit they aren’t. It’s a horrible, heartbreaking feeling. But sometimes what they need is their ‘somebody’. That shoulder, that smile. That look that you can give them that tells them somebody loves them. No matter what is going on inside them. No matter how they feel. No matter how big the dark cloud is that surrounds them.
They need to know you are there. They need somebody. And you, too, can be somebody for those you love.
If you are scared of mental issues, that’s fine, because it IS scary. It may be one of the scariest things you will ever have to deal with in your life. But remember they are scared too. They are probably petrified. And they need to know they have somebody. Somebody who loves them.
To all of those people in my life who have allowed me to become somebody, I thank you. And I promise you, each and every one of you, because sadly there are so many, that I am here for you and I am not going anywhere. I am here for you when you need me on your darkest days and I’ll be here for you when we come out the other end together and can celebrate our highest of highs.
To anyone with a mental illness please know that there is somebody. Whether it’s a friend, a family member or someone on the end of the Lifeline phone. There is always somebody.
To everyone else I urge you to become somebody. Become the somebody your loved one needs. That somebody that so many people in this situation think doesn’t exist.
You may think you are nobody but the moment you offer support you become someone. Someone who can help. Someone who can save a life. And that is the most priceless gift you can give.
“To the world you may just be one person. But to one person you may be the world.”