November 19 was International Men’s day, if you knew that you almost certainly heard about it last March. On the 8th of March to be precise.
On International Women’s Day.
According to the IMD website:
Objectives of International Men’s Day include a focus on men’s and boy’s health, improving gender relations, promoting gender equality, and highlighting positive male role models. It is an occasion for men to celebrate their achievements and contributions, in particular their contributions to community, family, marriage, and child care while highlighting the discrimination against them.
If you didn’t know it was International Men’s Day yesterday don’t worry, it’s not an indication of subconscious misandry or another sign of the matriarchy dominating our society, yet again. It’s simply that the only time men pay any attention to International Men’s Day is not on the actual day, it’s on International Women’s Day.
This is either evidence that the last sentence was right, or proof that Google has been taken over by feminazis prosecuting their kill-all-men agenda.
In yet more proof that man-haters are taking over the world, Richard Herring gets up early every 8th of March and spends the day searching for men sneering about IWD and demanding to know when International Men’s Day happens. Then he very politely answers them. As he wrote in The Guardian yesterday:
There are thousands to get through. It goes on relentlessly, for hours and hours, but I try to get to them all because to see the same moronic question asked over and over again by people (who don’t even think just to check Google to make sure they’re not making an arse of themselves) is very funny, and shows exactly why an International Women’s Day is necessary.
Incidentally, nobody tweets me back to say “Oh thanks for the information. I was wondering when it was.” Almost like they don’t want to know the answer to their own question.
And sarcasm aside, this is exactly the problem with all the men (and women *waves to Bettina Arndt and Miranda Devine*) who protest so often about the public attention given to women’s issues, namely male violence and female poverty.
Trying to twist data and present strawman evidence that these things don’t really exist is not advocating for men, it’s advocating against women.
Arguing that men are also victims of domestic violence (which is absolutely true) is not advocating for men, not when the thrust of their argument is that women commit domestic violence as often as men (which is absolutely not true) rather than talking about the services needed by male victims of domestic violence.
Claiming that women earn less money than men because they choose to is ludicrous, and doesn’t do anything to advance the issues that genuinely affect men in the work place, like workplace injuries, the demands of physical labour on an ageing male workforce, expectations of longer hours and the presumption that men should prioritise career over family.
If someone was going to be an advocate for men, and surely International Men’s Day would be the time to do that, traducing the women who advocate for other women is a patently silly way to go about it.
So, because I didn’t see any advocating for men yesterday, and I do care about men and the significantly gendered issues that cause them grief and trauma, I’m going to help out the men’s rights activists a bit. These are a few of the issues that disproportionally affect men in Australia. There are obviously more, but if you want to be an activist and an advocate for men, women are not your topic, these things are something to start on:
Suicide: More than three times as many men as women commit suicide, so this is a tragic issue that disproportionally affects men in Australia. As with any subject like this, the causes are complex, the solutions difficult and the topic needs to be discussed much more, and with great care. We know who the most at risk groups are and we should be targeting services to them. Mensline is available for online or telephone assistance 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. This service should be promoted on any article about mental health issues and suicide, and we also need far more men speaking out about mental health issues and how men can respond when they see their friends and family in trouble. Despite some progress, Australian’s mental health system is struggling, and more work, more money, more publicity and more government assistance is needed to make it effective. Men can and should be advocating for more services here.
Violence: Men are more likely to be victims of violence than women. They are in the most danger from other men, who they do not know, when they are outside their homes. These facts are barely even recognised in the public debate about violence on our streets and it needs to be talked about much more. Men should be able to go out and enjoy themselves without being at risk of assault by strangers
Imprisonment: Men account for 92% of all prisoners in Australia. This is a horrifically disproportionate amount, and is yet another issue that is rarely in the public view. Much more attention is needed on this, we need to understand why men are so much more prone to commit crimes than women, and address not only the root causes, but also the way we deal with men who have committed crimes. Much more investigation is needed into recidivism and how we can divert men away from the justice system.
Family: Men, on average, work at last 5 hours a week more than women and make up less than 30% of people working part time. This means men with families are less able to participate in caring for their children. They are not expected to be part of the daily lives of small children in the same way that mothers are, and so they miss out on many of the small but importance aspects of their children growing up. Having a parent doing pick-up and drop-off at childcare and school, going to parties and concerts, watching school performances, playing with them every day or even caring for them when they are sick are all very important to young children. Having fathers there for those moments as a matter of course, not a special event, would be hugely beneficial for everyone concerned. Again, this should be a significant aspect of the public discussion of workplace flexibility and work/life balance.
There are other issues, particularly to do with cultural expectations of manliness that do significant damage to men. The idea that boys don’t cry, aren’t sensitive or empathetic is buried deep in our perception of “real men”, and it hurts them. This TED talk by Tony Porter is an eloquent plea for greater understanding of the damage such ideas cause, it is an absolute must watch for anyone who wants to know more about this topic (warning: discusses sexual assault and emotional abuse).
If this article has brought up any issues for you, contact Mensline on 1300 78 99 78 or Lifeline on 13 11 14