The frustrating but exciting first week back at work after a new baby

Less than two hours in, as I was, quite literally, juggling a baby and work, it all came rushing back. Ah, the juggle, in all of its familiar, gritty glory.   

Whilst I spent my first hour “back at work” with the full use of both hands, the second hour was more complex. I was reduced to using a single hand tapping away at my laptop, perched next to me on the couch, as I used my other hand to prop up the baby I was nursing. It wasn’t the plan, of course. The plan was to have a good chunk of work time before feeding time came around.

But babies, in my experience, rarely consult “plans”. Le enfant was unwell and a feed from mum was all that would do. She fed while I worked, organised a doctor appointment, mentally reshuffled my day and felt a rush of gratitude for flexible work. But I’d be lying if I didn’t also admit to some frustration.

I had woken up happily anticipating the prospect of powering through several productive hours of work before switching gears. It was not to be. 

Flexibility is, without a doubt, the blessed oil that enables the work-family wheel to keep spinning, particularly when small babies are involved. But it is not without its challenges.  

In the throes of working flexibly, the structure – and sanctuary – of an office and set hours can be the stuff of fantasies. (As it is in the reverse).

Earlier this year when I last worked formally, I had a three year old and an almost-six year old. One went to preschool, the other went to school and I went to an office. It was a juggle, yes, but it was very different to working from home with a seven-month old baby, even with a fantastic and familiar carer on hand.  

Switching between work and caring is something of an art form and it takes practise. Less than a week into being back working, I am remembering that it’s the mental manoeuvring between roles that is the hardest to wrangle.  

I am reminded that whilst days at home with a baby can stretch out and seem long, when trying to work, those very same days feel far too short. I’ve barely sat down and an hour has gone by. Blink, and it’s feed time again. The day is over before it even began. 

I am reminded that my intentions and reality will not always match up. On some days, I might achieve more than I thought possible, and on others, I won’t.

I am reminded of the joy that comes from immersing myself in a baby when I have spent a few hours immersed in something completely different. I remember the thrill of seeing a six year old’s face light up when I “finish” work.  

I am reminded that, for me, the only way to manage coming in and out of work is by focusing on what’s in front of me at any given time. During bath-time or the kids’ dinner, work can wait. During work time, the laundry and dinner can wait.

I am reminded of the rush that follows time spent being productive and feeling stimulated.

I am reminded why spending seven months being single-minded about our new baby and our family was a blessing. 

I am reminded that the patience, efficiency and flexibility that the juggle necessitates and entails mirrors the patience, efficiency and flexibility that parenting babies and small children necessitates and entails. 

I am reminded that the trick is to make hay while the sun shines. Time spent working with both hands free? A luxury worth enjoying. Because it won’t always last.