When I attended my Dad’s memorial in January 2024, I didn’t think I was about to also experience an act of violence that would change almost everything in my life. I was bashed over the head and face several times with a full champagne bottle by a person I’d once loved.
Almost two years later, I’m now launching a campaign to help protect women from having to go through what I did when the police got involved.
At the local hospital casualty room after the attack, I felt lucky to be alive. I was too shocked and injured to make sound decisions. I wanted to make a police report, but my head was foggy. My family had gathered from afar to share our grief. I needed time to decide when.
But the next night I was arrested at my home. I made a voluntary video statement but police refused to take a report from me of my assault, saying there was no way for me to make a separate report.
My attacker got in first. My serious injuries weren’t seen by police as relevant. The officer who charged me said words to the effect: “it’s not a competition about who has the worst injuries”. Rather it seemed to be a race for who reported to police first.
A Local Court magistrate dismissed the charge and application for an AVO against me in December 2024, finding that I was the victim of a repeated attack with a “heavy, dangerous” weapon by a “violent aggressor”.
Police still refuse to investigate the assault against me, giving me no explanation why.
I’m one of a large and unfortunately still growing number of women who police, when responding to family and domestic violence call outs throughout Australia and internationally, continue to misidentify as primary aggressors instead of as victim/survivors.
I’m speaking out about my recent experience for the first time this week as part of The United Nation’s international campaign 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence. The Safer Ways campaign aims to focus on the huge prevalence of police misidentification, and to help advocate for solutions to these police failures.
NSW Crime statistics show that when NSW police charge a woman with a family and domestic violence assault, in 54 per cent of cases, those women were previously identified as victim/survivors. Similar figures exist for all states and territories.
For First Nations women, the rate in NSW is 80 per cent. Other vulnerable women, including those from migrant communities or with disabilities, are also at a much higher risk of police misidentification.
Women are convicted, some incarcerated and can lose child custody or their jobs, lose employment opportunities, their families and their reputations, as well as any peace of mind. Trauma from family and domestic violence is multiplied by the police and the legal system.
While we know that 1,000 Australian women every week are refused legal support in family and domestic violence matters, that likely doesn’t include those police have misidentified.
Police know the women had been victims, or should have known, when they charge them. The statistics don’t include women who, like myself, haven’t been known to police as past survivors but who used self-defence against an attacker.
Police misidentification is not only a life changing and traumatising outcome for women wrongly arrested and charged, it’s also huge waste of scarce and valuable family and domestic violence resources.
Even when faced with their own errors, police often “leave it to the courts to decide”, shifting the responsibility for working out who’s the victim and the primary aggressor onto our already overburdened court system.
Courts could be hearing cases where they have viable evidence of guilt instead of pursuing cases like mine where victims have used self-defence, or similar. Police could be charging my attacker and stopping other family and domestic violence offenders from getting away with using violence.
Victorian researchers and other experts believe that misidentification is not a mistake police make, but a cultural problem within police organisations, which can’t be solved with better training.
We need Safer Ways to report and a wider choice of skilled, experienced and trauma-informed responders. The funding police receive to respond to family and domestic violence reports needs to be better allocated; shared to organisations that can employ effective and safer responders who are skilled in accurately identifying primary aggressors from victim/survivors, and are best placed to link with other, frontline services.
We are mature enough as a society to have nuanced discussions about better options. Those options can look at what’s needed in specific locations and circumstances for reporting family and domestic violence, and at having a choice about who responds. With only 40 per cent of victims reporting, its long overdue that we have these options available.
We fund police to respond to emergency calls for family and domestic violence incidents, but they’re failing victims of family and domestic violence and making things worse instead of helping. Police can’t be trusted to respond to family and domestic violence without expert co-responders or, where suitable, alternative responders.
Co-responder and alternative responder services are being used in a range of locations and settings with initial and anecdotal results looking positive that they are providing Safer Ways.
A Go Fund Me campaign was set up to help me recoup some of my legal costs, for the advocacy campaign & to help hold NSW Police to account. Read more or make a donation here.
Feature images: Jacquie Thomson (left) and an image from the day she was wrongfully charged (right).
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If you or someone you know is experiencing, or at risk of experiencing, domestic, family or sexual violence call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732, chat online via 1800RESPECT.org.au or text 0458 737 732.
If you are concerned about your behaviour or use of violence, you can contact the Men’s Referral Service on 1300 766 491 or visit www.ntv.org.au.
Feeling worried or no good? No shame, no judgement, safe place to yarn. Speak to a 13YARN Crisis Supporter, call 13 92 76. This service is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
In an emergency, call 000.