On Saturday, I was a guest at the most perfect wedding. The grounds were beautiful – a pond with coloured water lilies. A fountain. Lemon trees in pots. Flowing champagne. Wooden church pews and a bride and groom glowing with love, loyalty and laughter.
This pair – Brittany and David – have already survived more than a young couple ever should; their love has truly been tested – and they’ve come out the other side. I didn’t last more than 13 seconds into the ceremony before weeping with joy. I was not the only one. The 80 family and friends in attendance were also united in their love for the couple.
Despite this – despite all the warmth and the feeling of deep gratitude for the people who make life worth living – the good eggs – today I feel incandescent rage. And ashamed to call myself a journalist.
Right before the ceremony started, guests were mingling and chatting on the lawns. Myself and two other women went to have our photo taken together on a small bridge over the pond. What fun!
A security guard approached me: “Are you comfortable having your photo taken here?” he asked us. He pointed to four people huddled in the shrubbery and went on to explain that hiding there across the paddock, were the paparazzi. And their cameras now had a direct line on us.
A helicopter was flying overhead too. Presumably from a news channel (you could even hear it inside the chapel).
If you’ve ever been white hot with anger, you’ll know this feeling. Suddenly, I was stalking in my long dress and heels, sinking into the mud with each step. Within seconds, I stood right in front of the bushes crew – and they looked alarmed.
“Where are you from?” I hollered out to the four people.
Under the Media Entertainment and Arts Alliance’s code of ethics, you must identify yourself and your employer. Only the bloke from Channel 9 told me his outlet. He did not tell me his name. (Although to be fair, I didn’t ask that.)
“Are you proud of the work you’re doing?” I shouted.
“Yes!” he said.
“Oh really?” I asked, “You are proud to be stalking a sexual assault survivor?”
In April, the Federal Court found, on the balance of probabilities, that Bruce Lehrmann raped Brittany Higgins at Parliament House in 2019. This means that these media people were knowingly stalking a rape survivor.
They had their cameras trained on me, but I took my own quick photo. Their discomfort was blatant (oh the irony!).
The four paparazzi did not respond to my accusation. The only woman in the pack turned her back on me – perhaps with shame. The Channel 9 camera operator then said to me: “You better go. They are going into the church.”
That’s right. He couldn’t wait to be rid of me. (Full disclosure: This exchange is from my best recollection – so it may not be word for word.)
I then told them that they were breaking the MEAA’s stipulations about privacy. And walked off back to the wedding venue in my now-muddy shoes.
Under the MEAA journalism of ethics, you must “use fair, responsible and honest means to obtain material.” You must not prey on vulnerable people. You must respect privacy. You must not intrude.
It’s well-known Britt struggled with mental health after the rape. So surely, she’s in this category?
I won’t lie – I looked at these four people skulking in the bushes – supposedly “just doing their jobs” – and became even more incensed. Three white middle-aged men, one middle aged woman. I wondered: Had any of THEM experienced sexual assault?
Among the wedding guests were many survivors. Including me. Like 2.2 million other Australian women, I have also experienced sexual violence. The media’s behaviour felt threatening. It gave us the sense of being stalked and trapped.
I’m also a journalist who has spent more than 20 years reporting on social justice issues. To me, it’s crucial the media works to make society better. Not more predatory.
On the one hand the media claims to hold power to account. Over and over again, you hear journos say this: We are the Fourth Estate. We are a vital pillar of democracy.
But in reality, so often, the media is actually using its power as an instrument of violence and intrusion against trauma survivors.
Why weren’t David and Britt allowed to have their perfect day in peace? Earlier this same day they had been getting into the lift at the hotel in pyjamas (it was in the wee hours) holding their wedding gear. And sure enough, a cameraperson with a long lens felt entitled to snap intrusive pictures of them. This was then turned into a salacious, vindictive article about a designer gown and the cost of the wedding.
Britt is not Beyonce. She never asked to be famous. She survived a sexual trauma that should never have happened. And she had to do it publicly, subjected to attacks from media outlets who sided with her rapist.
You might know her from the media. I personally know Brittany as a truly good human. A person of intelligence, love and integrity. A person who is entitled to privacy. On her wedding day, that privacy was seriously violated by the media.
In their new home in France, the media has continually broken France’s strict privacy laws by identifying where Brittany and David live and by taking their photo without permission. The media intrusion at this wedding shows that Australia needs privacy laws similar to France. At what point will the media stop their harassment of a proven rape victim?
So many journalists feel they have a right to take something that isn’t theirs – to take the traumas and experiences of everyday people and turn them into clicks on a website. And yet the media isn’t there afterwards to comprehend or try to heal the harm that has been done. Yes, there are journalists who are good, honest, careful and hardworking. But so often this is not the case. We need to use our power with integrity – not to tread on those who are already harmed.
The author has been granted permission by Higgins and Shiraz to share this piece.