Searching for a new professional or leadership job is never easy at the best of times. Irrelevant of sector, profession, experience and runs on the board, it’s a roller coaster ride to say the least.
Whether on a $100K or $1 million salary band, the search is testing at best and soul destroying at worst. Even the most resilient of executives can be triggered, frustrated and perplexed with the twists and turns of the hiring ecosystem.
Success is more than an exceptional resume, vast list of achievements, stellar LinkedIn profile and acclaimed reputation. You must be emotionally ready and in an optimal place to traverse fickle recruitment systems.
If any of the following resonate please press the pause button. All result in a lack of energy and confidence, are often concomitant and will impede success.
a) Unresolved or ongoing issues
Work issues include bullying, intersectional discrimination, redundancy, aimlessness, burnout and Corporate Stockholm Syndrome (identifying with and loyal to an employer who mistreats).
External issues include divorce, death, social conflict, domestic abuse, mental and physical health issues.
b) Paralysing fear
Do thoughts of job searching generate unbridled fear? There is a long line between carefulness and dread. And for women who have been in the same company or role for a long time it can be paralysing.
c) Lingering anger & resentment
Do you catch yourself living in the past and dwelling 24/7 on negative work or life experiences? Do you ruminate with resentment on how you have been treated?
d) Low self-esteem
A lack confidence intersects with low self-esteem and self doubt. But when it becomes a deep sense of inadequacy moving into shame territory it’s a cautionary sign to redress.
e) Physical
These include sleep disturbances, headaches, backache, digestion and appetite issues.
f) Procrastination
Chronic procrastination and self sabotage.
Unpacking stress, trauma & anxiety
The Australian Institute of Health & Welfare in their latest research found 75 per cent of adults have experienced trauma in their lives and 59 per cent of Australians experienced at least one personal stressor in the last twelve months.
Stress and trauma is different but both impact readiness in a job and career search.
Stress is a response to challenging or new life events such as a job loss, exams, deadlines, finances, or divorce. Trauma is an experience of extreme stress or shock such as life threatening events, natural disasters, accidents, death, abuse, sexual assaults.
There are two forms of anxiety. Somatic anxiety, (known as somatisation) is the physical manifestation of anxiety. Whereas cognitive anxiety, is the mental manifestation of anxiety, or the specific thought processes that occur during anxiety, such as concern or worry.
Christine Sutherland is a clinical behavioural researcher at Lifeworks Group. She shared that somatised feelings and conditioned intrusive thoughts occur in the limbic area of the brain. This can completely overwhelm conscious cognition sending a person into fight/flight/freeze. In this state it’s impossible to do the simplest of tasks so a break for resolution is essential.
Christine urges people to identify the various unique conditioned stimuli that give rise to maladaptive responses and work to eradicate them. And if symptoms linger or worsen to seek treatment.
Getting ready
1) Professional help
A psychologist or psychotherapist can be invaluable to support and reframe. In many cases, it’s essential.
2) Self-reflection
Reflect on the root cause of resentment and anxiety. Journaling is very effective.
3) Acknowledge emotions
Give space and respect to your feelings without judgement. You are allowed to be devastated or angry and work through the grieving process.
4) Set realistic goals
Start with a few tiny achievable goals to strengthen your confidence.
5) Focus on strengths
Shift the narrative to what you can do, not what you cannot do. Remind yourself of your strengths and wins.
6) Stomp on negative self talk
What you think about yourself is felt by others. Challenge the nonsense you are telling yourself. Is that opinion of yourself really true? Reality statements are not value judgements
7) Affirmations
What is meaningful affirmations that give you joy? Plaster them everywhere.
8) Network of support
It goes without saying a strong professional and personal network is enriching. But don’t allow naysayers or negative folk to come into your orbit as you get back on your feet.
9) Give yourself priority
Anything that reduces stress and impacts mindfulness is key. Do what brings you joy.
Put your happiness as a priority.
10) Boundaries
Strengthen your boundary muscles. No is a complete sentence that you have full right to implement.
A psychotherapist’s experience
Brigitte Duclos was a high flying TV & radio personality who was blindsided when she lost her job without warning. So she knows first-hand how career trauma impacts and erodes self esteem.
Now a psychotherapist and counsellor she works with many clients at a career crises. They have often been bullied, burnt out, fired or made redundant.
Confidence plummets and feelings of being totally incapable arise. She supports clients to not take what happened personally. But in some instances, people need to take ownership of the part they played in their situation so they can move forward.
Brigitte believes happiness results when actively living your core values. “Getting clients to reframe strengths and circumstances alongside identifying their values is essential. It’s about putting into context what their values look like and how they align to purpose”
She advises to take time out to reassess and not rush into a new role.
Know that it’s ok to press pause
It’s absolutely appropriate to press pause. Along with Christine Sutherland and Brigitte Duclos, I advocate taking time out before jumping into the job search saddle.
Often there are urgent financial pressures that foist job search activities. If necessary, seek stress free temporary or contract work if you can. Don’t apply for any permanent role at your general level.
And whether you are emotionally ready or not, always remember you have unique value and ‘no one does what you do in the same way you do it’.