Recently, I was asked by a friend what excuse she should use to get out of a difficult client meeting. She had three options, all of them relating to the sudden onslaught of a specific ailment: a terrible migraine, a stomach virus, a nasty fall that had left her unable to get to the office (and would require faking a sprained ankle for the next couple of days).
It was a really important meeting and she needed a really good excuse to get out of it. Which did I think was the most debilitating and believable, she wanted to know.
I went for option number four. None of the above. I told her to suck it up and attend the meeting. I advised her to present some killer ideas, be a complete professional no matter how difficult the client, and to plan to enjoy a nice glass of South Australian Shiraz when it was all over.
She didn’t like my advice. She wanted validation it would be ok to not attend. I refused to give it to her. I reminded her instead that she’s good at her job, so good that she’s been asked to present at this particular client meeting, and that she should remind her audience exactly why they had chosen her.
Why do we default to finding an excuse to get out of a situation we think might be difficult? Why do we think the things we least want to participate in can only go badly?
And why do we search for validation from others to get out of doing something we don’t want to do? Why not take personal responsibility for our own decisions, and accept the personal consequences when we decide to do the wrong thing?
I believe it comes back to that constant need to ‘back yourself‘: to believe you can not only handle the situation, but play a part in actually improving it (or at least learn a small life lesson that’ll help you cope next time).
That means taking on the most challenging of meetings, dealing with the worst clients, and getting stuck into that difficult project you’ve been putting off for days. It’s the ‘work’ part of ‘working’ – the bit most of us hate about our jobs. But it’s the ‘work’ part that ultimately puts us in line for the next promotion, pay rise and opportunity.
If it’s hard, it’ll be all the more rewarding in the long-run. And if it’s easy, it’ll boost your confidence up another notch, making you less inclined to dread whatever it is you dread the next time around.
So in short, quit wasting time on coming up with the perfect excuse and get on with the challenging stuff. Attend, be present, put in your best work. Your career will thank you later.
And anyway, you may want to save the sick leave for when you’re actually sick.