As we near the end of the year and we slip into reflection mode, I am wondering what story you are telling yourself and others about the year that was.
Are you focusing on what has gone well, the wins you have had, what you have achieved, how you have contributed and the connections you have grown and maintained? Are you telling the stories of the experiences and the snippets from the year that have made you smile, laugh and given you moments of joy?
Or are you focused on the things you haven’t achieved, the things you have been unable to control or influence, the disappointments, setbacks and struggles and the relationships you haven’t nurtured or the losses you have endured?
The stories we tell others and ourselves create our reality. They shape who we are now and who will be tomorrow. They influence our feelings, our emotions and how we approach each day. They shape how we respond to each situation that life throws our way and how others respond to us.
We can transform our own lives by changing our stories and shifting our focus.
I experienced my own transformation several years ago when I shifted the spotlight away from what was not going well, from what I could not control and from the disappointments in my life … to shining a light onto the brighter things that had always been there but I had failed to pay attention too.
That is not to say that I ignore the disappointments, challenges and struggles in my life for they all leave clues that must be given attention if I am to achieve the life I want. Many of our stories have hidden within them our excuses for why we didn’t have the year that we had hoped for.
These excuses are just that … excuses. They help us to justify our lot in life but they do nothing to create a different outcome.
More than anything our stories can keep us stuck, hold us back and keep us from experiencing happiness and fulfilment in our careers, and in all parts of our lives.
Changing my story took time, practice and persistence. But, importantly, it changed my reality. It has allowed me to create a business I never thought possible, develop a strong, loving, intimate relationship that had eluded me for so long and to become healthier than I had been in years.
We all have the potential to create change and to design the story of our life. If you are thinking that 2013 was ok but nothing to get excited about … then start creating a more exciting story for 2014.
Life is too short to merely survive and get by! So as we near the end of the year, ask yourself:
- Are the stories you are telling about the year, serving and supporting you or are they dragging you down?
- Is your focus on what has been positive about the year or are you giving more time and energy to what has not been so great?
- Are your excuses (I’m too busy, I’m not experienced enough, I’m just a mum, I’m not good enough) holding you back or keeping you stuck?
With the new year approaching, now is the perfect time to take stock and commit to tweaking the way we approach our career and each part of our life. By taking accountability for creating change, we all have the potential to achieving the type of success we desire.
What stories and excuses are holding you back? What are you going to do differently in 2014?