Dear Tony Abbott, Want to take a real stand against family violence? Start by treating women equally. - Women's Agenda

Dear Tony Abbott, Want to take a real stand against family violence? Start by treating women equally.

In Australia, on average, a woman is killed every single week by an intimate partner. Once a fortnight, on average, an Australian child is killed by a parent. This year we have already exceeded these averages and because of that, chances are, you are familiar with these damning statistics. Because barely a week passes where there isn’t a tragic cause to contemplate them; to witness the unimaginable toll that family violence continues to take on our communities. 

Earlier today the Prime Minister Tony Abbott, the Opposition Leader Bill Shorten, the Victorian Police Commissioner Ken Lay, the Governor-General Sir Peter Cosgrove, the Ambassador for Women and Girls and Our Watch chair Natasha Stott-Despoja and the Sex Discrimination Commissioner Liz Broderick were among those leaders who convened in Canberra to take a stand against domestic violence. Their solidarity in rejecting violence against women and children, on the eve of White Ribbon Day, is encouraging. 

The Prime Minister said this:

“I just want to say to any woman in our country who is feeling vulnerable, who is feeling frightened – please, do not suffer in silence. Please, make contact with the police in the first instance. You should not suffer in silence and know from today’s event that you are never alone. All of us are there to help. Anyone who is being persecuted, anyone who is being oppressed but particularly women and children who are being persecuted, who are being oppressed or victimised in their own homes. It must never happen. And our job is to make sure that it stops.”

He is right. It is our job to make it stop. You would struggle, I hope, to find a person the country over who disagrees, someone who accepts this violence as palatable or deems the situation unworthy of change. But, whether we like it or not, implicitly, we all contribute to the problem.

“The evidence is clear – violence against women is linked to gender inequality,” Stott Despoja says. “Therefore, to prevent violence against women, we must address the norms and behaviours that support rigid gender roles and stereotypes. You do not have to be a CEO, a Police Commissioner or an elected representative to take the lead against domestic and family violence. Calling out a sexist comment or belief at work, in your sport club or next social gathering is something we can all do.”

She is right. Until we recognise the context in which family violence takes place no single display of solidarity, however promising, can touch the sides in arresting this sinister scourge. Inequality is the grease that oils the wheels of violence against women and children. And whether we like it or not inequality between men and women in Australia is a problem.

Until we are ready to address and reject the small seeds that allow this inequality to flourish it will continue. Until we are ready to address and reject the big seeds that allow this inequality to flourish, it will continue.

Family violence will continue to devastate our communities until we are ready to put the whole puzzle together; to accept that sexism perpetuates inequality and that inequality perpetuates family violence. Until we are ready to have that conversation no breakfast and no amount of solidarity will effect change.

I do not doubt the government’s sincerity in seeking to address the issue of family violence. The establishment of Our Watch and the funding allocated to researching the problem, are proof it’s an issue it considers seriously. 

But I question the credibility of this government to address it. Why? Because this government, whether it accepts it or not, is part of the problem. This government, whether it accepts it or not, perpetuates both sexism and inequality.

Because a political leader citing a female candidate’s sex appeal in an election campaign perpetuates sexism. 

Because a governing group that is comprised of 18 men and a single woman perpetuates inequality. 

Because a governing group that seeks to defend its composition by saying merit is the criteria for inclusion, without further inquiry, perpetuates inequality and sexism. 

Because a finance minister who describes the issue of gender representation as a side issue, and whose choice of disparaging language is “girlie man” perpetuates sexism and inequality.  

Because an education minister who accepts that females won’t earn as much money as men perpetuates sexism and inequality. 

Because an employment minister who inaccurately links breast cancer and abortion perpetuates sexism.

And, perhaps most damningly of all, a government that does all of the above and doesn’t once see fit to correct itself and address the problem at the root of each of these instances – a subversive attitudes towards women – perpetuates inequality and sexism.

I question the credibility of a government that fails to treat women equally to implore those in our communities to do the same. If Tony Abbott meant what he said this morning that “our job is to make sure that it stops,” it is his job to make sexism and inequality in his government stop. Until that happens, Mr Abbott, you are contributing to the very context that enables family violence to take place in the first place. Not on my watch.

If you or someone you know is impacted by sexual assault, family or domestic violence, call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 or visit www.1800RESPECT.org.au. In an emergency, call 000

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