It’s Mother’s Day again, and you’ve probably been inundated with ads telling you what you want. Apparently, according to most of these ads, what you really want is something to cook or clean with.
The irony isn’t lost on me – the holiday meant to celebrate mothers is still, too often, tied up in the invisible labour that defines our daily lives.
This is exacerbated for me at the moment as I’m straight out of Women Deliver and State Budget related activities and now knee-deep in organising my son’s birthday which tends to always fall on the same weekend – I’m getting tired just thinking about it!
So what do mums really want this coming weekend? Let me tell you, it’s not a new vacuum cleaner (or if we do want one, that’s a household gift thanks, not one for Mother’s Day).
Earlier this year, the World Economic Forum announced its prediction that gender equality is still 123 years away. Enter the likes of the current US President, and we’re looking at that figure potentially blowing out even further.
Closer to home, as of 1 July 2026, Australian parents will have access to 26 weeks of paid parental leave. While that’s not quite the year of 100% paid leave that families in Sweden and Norway have access to, it’s a step in the right direction in enabling partners other than the birth parent to step in and care for their children.
But it’s a complicated, layered issue that is going to take some years to unravel.
For example, Australian women also represent 7 out of 10 primary carers, at precisely the ages – 35 to 44 years – when careers are meant to peak. And with part-time employees 2.7 times more likely to be women than men, it’s clear that we have some catching up to do when it comes to flexible work.
We also know that Aussie women spend on average eight hours more each week on unpaid domestic work than men. For those women living with children, this means 35 hours a week of unpaid domestic work, compared to 20 hours to men. That’s almost double their male counterparts.
I recently had a heated discussion with a well meaning male neighbour who was arguing that the current kindergarten hours were sexist, assuming mothers could work around perceived short hours (designed to suit children, not parents). I appreciated his intent and allyship, but the whole premise of his argument was sexist itself. Was there a policy that only mums can do drop off and pick ups? No. Then why are education hours a problem just for mums and women? He went quiet after that.
So aside from the flowers and the sleep in that are hopefully a non-negotiable for mum this Mother’s Day, what else could really turn the dial for future generations of mothers?
Fair and equitable pay: The gender pay gap sits at 21.1%. Every one of these dollars compounds over a lifetime – throughout superannuation, decisions made around caregiving and the cost of returning to work. Equal pay shouldn’t be a gift, it’s a right.
Recognition and reform of unpaid work: The unpaid economy is estimated to be worth $688 billion annually to the Australian economy. Of that figure, women’s unpaid work contributes $427.3 billion and yet still doesn’t show up in GDP, in super contributions or in career progression.
Increased parental leave Parental leave remains at a set minimum wage level in Australia so whilst the extension of time coming into effect in July are welcomed, imagine the shift that may occur if rates are matched at your earning levels and a full 12 months was offered.
Caring for children, ageing parents and those with a disability – this vital work keeps our society functioning. It deserves more recognition and respect.
For fathers to be empowered to step fully in: Yes, this starts with paternity leave – genuine, accessible, adequately paid and actively encouraged by employers. But it doesn’t end there. We need more men working part-time, more men in flexible and caregiving roles and more men taking the burden of the mental load.
It means businesses being open to co-leadership models, where women aren’t forced to choose between ambition and family. And it means more men doing the full job, not just the ‘fun bits’. It’s remembering the library books, the birthday gifts, clearing out the clothes that no longer fit and making sure the next size is ready to go.
A note to dads on Mother’s Day
Sure, we’re asking for systemic change here. And, that’s not going to happen before Sunday. So what can you do in the meantime?
- Don’t ask what you can do – look around and do it. This list is visible if you choose to see it.
- Take something off the mental load and own it. Entirely. Book the lessons, follow through by taking your children there and making sure that mum doesn’t have to plan or pack anything.
- Skip appliances this Mother’s Day. Seriously.
- Make it a habit, not a one-day gesture. The best Mother’s Day gift is the one that keeps giving – every school run, every RSVP, every ‘I’ll handle it’ that you actually mean and actually do.
Mothers don’t want flowers instead of freedom, we want both. We want to live in a society, and raise our children in one, where 123 years to gender equality isn’t acceptable. Happy Mother’s Day. Now let’s get to work.